“Keep reinventing the way you love yourself.”
Summer grows roots from my feet into the soil of this land. The sun bleaches streaks of blonde in my strawberry hair, and freckles emerge like seeds on my skin.
The earth and light do their part to keep me here, though the wind blows in some afternoons and I feel the old pull of travel tug at my chest.
On morning walks with the dogs, Waylon on my back, I follow worn paths through the forest and imagine the roots of my feet rolling up and down the land like waves, loosening my body with each step so I may follow the breath of air.
Some mornings before I finish my tea, the light travels for me, and I step outside to move with the rising mist and sun rays filtering down toward the soil, whispering a single word: soften.
I remember the tug I often feel while traveling, to stop in one place and dig in, to find the veins of the land and match my rhythm to their pulse.
The morning turns to day imperceptibly, suddenly, and tasks take their place in my mind as the sun rises high into a clear sky. It’s time to tend to the fields now.
All day the light travels, bringing evening about, and we hang our tools and prepare dinner and sit outside to eat as the earth tilts away from the sun and the sky dances itself into sunset.
The air is still and my chest is quiet and my soles root into grass.
The light deepens into night, and though I’ve not left this land all day, I’ve witnessed movement, been part of the full round stretch of day and the long exhale of twilight.
There are times when the roads of my inner landscape are covered with rocks, and my ankles feel weak, and I’m not sure which way to go, until a note of beauty strikes my ears and I gulp in the sounds directing me aright. There are times when life is so full that the smallest ounce of beauty brings me to tears.
Beauty doesn’t hide in the realm of joy. That’s it’s power–it’s ability to catch us as we stumble, it’s ability to wake us from blindness, to hold us in sadness, to guide us through pain.
There is so much beauty in this world. Why can’t we bathe in it, share it, spread it?
That’s what I’m after now, to share beauty with you all. So I share with you this song, A Clearing in the Wild, by Red Tail Ring, which struck a chord in my heart and re-awakened a longing that pulls me to the wilderness:
“let yourself go
sigh like the rapids
breathe down your body
let the dam overflow
and release the day like a thunder of sparrows
and lie in the stillness when everything’s gone.”
It’s high summer, when computer time dwindles and the fields keep me outside. I turn my posts now to frames of beauty, to moments of stillness and moments of wonder and moments that rush through my heart, beating me alive.